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Tag Archives: Guitar Monster

First, I need to say that you have to get this album. It kicks a million asses eight days a week.

Now that that’s out of the way I can start. This album contains a song you might all know: “One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer.” Initially this was to be the focus of this album, and still is. However, what I decided to change was the types of alcoholic beverages highlighted in the post. The original idea was to pick my favorite bourbon, scotch, and beer and discuss their merits. However, this doesn’t make much sense given the context of the song.

Second, “One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer” is a cover of John Lee Hooker’s version, which is in turn a spin on Amos Milburn’s 1953 hit “One Scotch, One Bourbon, One Beer”. I was unaware of this for the longest time so here’s a video for the uninformed:

Third, I don’t want to  neglect any of the other equally good or better songs on this album. However, I’ve never been to Delaware, so I don’t really have any clever quips about “Deleware Slide”. I’m not going to write about how things songs sound, because it would do the song, and every other song on this album, a huge disservice. But it still deserves, no, demands a listen. So listen to it, goddamn it. And feel free to preview the few featured on this post.

Ok, enough lollygagging. One bourbon, one scotch, one beer. Which ones would you drink if you were broke, womanless/manless, and hitting an enviable 3 a.m. last call? Keep in mind all of the picks have to be cheap because you’re broke, remember? So, here are my picks:

One Bourbon

Bourbon snifter not included.

During my years in Cincinnati and Covington, KY I had a lot of experience with Bourbon. I mean A LOT of experience. I’ve tried over 50 types of bourbon since I was, ahem, 21. The actual number is locked away in a barrel in the back of my head. So, if I remember correctly, I’m kind of an expert.

During most trips to The Party Source or one of Covington’s 2 billion liquor stores I’d pick up a bottle of Old Heaven Hill Bonded. Bonded Bourbon’s the assortment that’s been stored in a government-secured storehouse for at least 4 years and packs 100 proof (50% alcohol) minimum. Old Heaven Hill’s aged for 10 years and only costs $9 for a fifth in Kentucky, which is absolutely ridiculous.

Heaven Hill is a major player in the distillery world and produces many of the finer Bourbons (Elijah Craig, Evan Williams, Fighting Cock, Henry McKenna, J. W. Dant, Old Fitzgerald) but its lowly Heaven Hill varieties rarely make it out of Kentucky. I’ve tried Heaven Hill Gold Label, Green Label, Black Label, and Old Heaven Hill Unbonded. They’re all great Bourbons for the buck and aren’t sweet like most cheap Bourbons. I need to get a few handles sent out West post haste.

That and a case of Ale-8-One: Kentucky’s soft drink and the absolute best mixer for Bourbon.

One Scotch


Ok, so not the cheapest scotch available, and I know I’m broke, but I still have to have some standards. J&B’s available at nearly every bar in the United States, is about the price of Jim Beam, and doesn’t taste like turpentine or swamp bog, which is what many expensive scotches taste like. J&B is all right by me.

Plus, it’s the favorite drink of Patrick Bateman. Patrick’s a man with a taste for Huey Lewis and the News, fine dining, and viciously murdering prostitutes. He’s a man who knows what he wants.

One Beer

Red Dog: A Class Act

Last night I met a brewer from Barcelona at one of the bars near my place. He’s in San Francisco for Beer Week and just wanted to talk and talk about his beer. It was really hard to figure out what he was saying because he was very drunk and had a super thick Catalan accent. Basically all I could understand was, “I love good beer, I love the hops!”

He kept pouring beer from one cup to another in attempts to aerate the brew and bring out the flavor. The only thing he succeeded in was spilling beer on the floor over and over. While this was happening his non-English speaking friend, who was wearing a turtleneck sweater and a backpack, danced like a 3-year-old in front of the soul-record-spinning DJ.

This wasted Barcelonian kept asking if we wanted to smoke weed or hash. Every now and then he’d slyly pull out these little nickel bags full of the stuff and give us a shit eating grin that said, “I’m a naughty boy, I love the herb!” I didn’t have the heart to tell him that you could light up a fat blunt on a school bus here and no one would give two shits. Seriously, I can’t walk a single block without smelling pot in this town.

I also didn’t have the heart to tell him that I used to only buy 30-packs of Red Dog in Kentucky for $13 dollars.

>>>Click here to download Awesomeness at 320 kbps


A1 You Got To Lose 3:15
Written-By – E. Hooker*
A2 Madison Blues 4:24
Written-By – E. James*
A3 One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer 8:20
Written-By – John Lee Hooker
A4 Kind Hearted Woman 3:48
Arranged By – George Thorogood
Written-By – Robert Johnson
A5 Can’t Stop Lovin 3:04
Written-By – E. James*
B1 Ride On Josephine 4:17
Written-By – E. McDaniel*
B2 Homesick Boy 3:02
Written-By – G. Thorogood*
B3 John Hardy 3:18
Arranged By – George Thorogood
Written-By – Traditional
B4 I’ll Change My Style 3:57
Written By – Parker-Villa
B5 Delaware Slide 7:45

*download below*

I don’t play guitar.  I don’t know the technial aspects of what makes a guitarist great.  However, what I can recognize is when a dude is, how you say, shredding.  And man can Jeff Beck shred.  If anyone checked out my Masayoshi Takanaka post you should definitely check out Wired.  I’m pretty sure Beck is Takanaka’s American half brother.

An undated photograph of Jeff Back at one of his infamous afterparties.

An undated photograph of Jeff Back at one of his infamous afterparties.


Download Jeff Beck – Wired Here < UPDATED



1. Led Boots

2. Come Dancing

3. Goodbye Pork Pie Hats

4. Head For Backstage Pass

5. Blue Wind

6. Sophie

7. Play With Me

8. Love Is Green

Also, check out Masayoshi Takanaka – Rainbow Goblins Story (Live at Bukokan) from my earlier post here.



Feel the Goblins.

Click here to active the Rebuilt Tranny Random Post Generator

***The MP3s are now a totally new rip. I did a better job cleaning the record up both physically and digitally this time around. I think you’ll be pleased with the bombastic Japanese sound. Thanks for listening.***

Here’s an album cover which immediately presents questions. Mainly that question is, “What the hell is happening to that fabulous Japanese man?”

First, let’s examine the title: Rainbow Goblins Story.  I’m not entirely sure what a Rainbow Goblin is or which intoxicant might hasten said Goblin’s arrival.  All I know is that I want to experience whatever Rainbow Gobglasm Takanaka’s experiencing in 12″ x 12″ glory.  So, I’m going to imagine that Rainbow Goblins are prismatic creatures that explode from the temporal lobe of chronic magic mushroom abusers. After all, shrooms were completely legal in Japan when this album was recorded.

However, this hypothesis poses a serious problem. There is a complete lack of giggling throughout the entirety of this live recording, which makes shroom usage questionable. The audience at Budokan might be the most polite, and suspiciously sober, group of spectators to ever enjoy a rockin’ symphonic trip through a deliciously technicolor daydream.  There’s no whistling, no cheering, no “OH MY GOD, MASAYOSHI, THIS GLOWING GOBLIN IS GOBBLING MY NOGGIN…MAKE IT STOP!” anywhere. ANYWHERE.

Well, “Takanaka!” may have been yelled once by a single raucous gentleman throughout the entire recording. Rest assured that this ruffian was forced to perform seppuku in the Budokan’s lost and found by the shadowy Budokan Suicide Squad.

Budokan Arena

Budokan Arena: Goblin Breeding Ground Zero

This album, in true Japanese fashion, is all about precision. Precise like a Seiko Chronograph. Now, that doesn’t mean that it’s a creamy stroll through Goblin Country, accompanied by buttery guitar strumming.  No, Masayoshi Takanaka shreds hard. Really fucking hard. You could bake a chicken pot pie to Takana’s Ax. But good luck finding a single note that’s out of time or out of tune. Every pluck falls in line like a good little Japanese note should.

Rainbow Goblins Story‘s a constant barrage of super-precise, super-fast, super-banzai rocking accompanied by a full crew of strings, synth, and a full cast of percussion. And, if my eyes can actually believe the video at the bottom of this post, Takanaka and his homeboys performed the whole concert wearing goddamn, NCAA mascot-sized goblin masks. I can’t even deal with that.

My only gripe is that there wasn’t an NES game based on this album.  It would have made a most triumphant 8-bit score.

Here’s the album:

Side 1

Click to download Side 1 at 320 kbps

1. Prologue

2. Once Upon a Song

3. Seven Goblins

4. The Sunset Valley

5. The Moon Rose

6. Soon

Click to download Side 2 at 320 kbps

1. Thunderstorm

2. Rising Arch

3. Plumed Bird

4. You can Never Come to This Place

This just made me pee my pants: